The Faded Sun series by C. J. Cherryh
I think someone once told me that C. J. Cherryh practiced Aikido in Seattle. When, and for how long, I don’t know. But it sure would explain why both her heroes and villains have a strong effect on the reader. She frequently delves into the relationship between two sides under conflict. Often, at least one side emerges stronger by understanding and embracing “the other.” Sometimes both sides.
I thought this was a strong, new and different look at the warrior and warriorship, a subject that is too often overlooked even in literatures supposedly devoted to it such as “Sword and Sorcery Fantasy” and “Military Space SF.”